Push and pull in Chinese society

Living in Chinese society, we have to face the push and pull of other people’s wants, in the guise of ‘selflessness,’ ‘brotherhood,’ ‘kinship,’ ‘goodname,’ ‘returning favor,’ ‘give and take,’ and ‘group acceptance.’ Sometimes, the feeling of helplessness is immersive. I do not ask for favor nor seek no help unless necessary. And I return favor as such. I give to others in need, but remember no favor. I give without seeing if this is my kin. I give out of need of the receiver. I have close friends, but I do not take advantage of such relationship. I also do not expect myself to give in to puny little demands from such person known as my kins or brother. Every moment is precious to me as a building block of my personality, career, and society. I care about everyone else, even if such person is my enemy. In face of my enemy, I hope he would see me as a person, a worthy rival and bear no grudges at the end of the fight. Sadly, Chinese society easily sees my principles as worthless ideals. Step out of line, and we will be buried by bad mouths. We will be seen as one without care nor love, who is insensitive, stubborn, and hard-hearted.