Treadmill of economy

I enjoy sitting down in a café with a close friend, chatting away or resting quietly. Such friends are hard to come by nowadays. The treadmill of economy means the good people are soon to be absorbed by the sheer force of work waiting for them. :(

Push and pull in Chinese society

Living in Chinese society, we have to face the push and pull of other people’s wants, in the guise of ‘selflessness,’ ‘brotherhood,’ ‘kinship,’ ‘goodname,’ ‘returning favor,’ ‘give and take,’ and ‘group acceptance.’ Sometimes, the feeling of helplessness is immersive. I do not ask for favor nor seek no help unless necessary. And I return favor as such. I give to others in need, but remember no favor. I give without seeing if this is my kin. I give out of need of the receiver. I have close friends, but I do not take advantage of such relationship. I also do not expect myself to give in to puny little demands from such person known as my kins or brother. Every moment is precious to me as a building block of my personality, career, and society. I care about everyone else, even if such person is my enemy. In face of my enemy, I hope he would see me as a person, a worthy rival and bear no grudges at the end of the fight. Sadly, Chinese society easily sees my principles as worthless ideals. Step out of line, and we will be buried by bad mouths. We will be seen as one without care nor love, who is insensitive, stubborn, and hard-hearted.

不老实

不老实的人，疑心也比较重。因为在算计人的时候，在别人眼里见到了自己。

Thinking about love.

I am thinking about love, and wanting to write something about love. Yet someone, a song, has expressed my heartfelt. Here it is:

To really love a woman
To understand her - you gotta know her deep inside
Hear every thought - see every dream
N' give her wings - when she wants to fly
Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms
Ya know ya really love a woman

When you love a woman you tell her
that she's really wanted
When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one
Cuz she needs somebody to tell her
that it's gonna last forever
So tell me have you ever really
- really really ever loved a woman?

To really love a woman
Let her hold you -
til ya know how she needs to be touched
You've gotta breathe her - really taste her
Til you can feel her in your blood
N' when you can see your unborn children in her eyes
Ya know ya really love a woman

You got to give her some faith - hold her tight
A little tenderness - gotta treat her right
She will be there for you, takin' good care of you
Ya really gotta love your woman...

Thinking about thinking.

Because we think ...

1. We feel sian (down)
2. We feel happy
3. We feel confused
4. We are confident
5. We have opinion
6. We have dreams
7. We think about possibilities
8. We breakthrough the norm
9. We make sacrifice
10. We love

Thinking makes us very human.

Fortune telling of my own life

2007 - Begin my PhD in the states
2010 - Finished my PhD
2012 - Published my first book
2013 - Joined the academia in a western country (Scandinavian or US)
2019 - Gain a bit of fame
2025 - Return to Singapore and become an Adjunct professor while starting a consulting firm
2030 - Active in social entrepreneurship

Don't ask me how I know. But its fun guessing. :)

The Need for Fame.

Without fame, a good man cannot find a good use. Fame is like brand, its what others see you as.

For scientists, Fame = PhD, publish books and journals.

Some are well published and famous, but can't do much work, but its another edge of the sword of fame. One need to grind and make oneself useful, then seek fame, for the good of others.

Small mindedness.

There is a Chinese term which is missing in English -- Xiao Ren (Literally mean Small Human). The real meaning is complex, covering narrow-mindedness, selfish, cunning, harmful, scheming, etc. 'Small' points to the mental quality of seeing the world as centered around yourself. The opposite Da Ren (Big Human), points to the mental quality of seeing the inter-dependencies of oneself within the society. A Da Ren will do what it takes for benefits of everyone.

Many Singaporeans, and I assume mostly Chinese, are keen learners. If they are as keen in teaching, I think we would be great. Sadly, I met many people socially and professionally, who are very keen in knowing what I am doing and how I do it. But I do not see much sharing of what they worked on. Also, publications are usually very poor. There is a lack of energy in initiating the flow of information. There is a strong Small Human mentality here. "If I teach people what I know, they can use the knowledge to my disadvantage." "If I can learn what people are doing, I can also do great things myself."

I do not mean a Big Human don't learn, but they would not overlook teaching as well. Learning and teaching at the same time is facilitating information flow. Learning but not teaching is like a junk collector taking up 'useful' stuffs and keep them to himself. Mostly useless to him anyways.